Restraint
by SarahLee1
Summary: After their first day in the meadow, Edward makes an unexpected visit to Bella in the middle of the night. He comes to her with a request—something about practicing his restraint. Is Edward being too risky?
1. Chapter 1

_**A/N: This is my first ever Twilight fic. I wrote in a freak surge of creativity one night. I wrote it for my own pleasure and it was pretty fun! The entire thing is three chapters. I hope you enjoy!**_

_Bella's POV_

**Restraint **

**Ch. 1**

I had just fallen into a light sleep when Edward climbed in through my bedroom window.

I had tossed and turned for almost two hours earlier in the night. I would close my eyes, but it was like I was forcing them to stay shut. Too many thoughts raced.

The day that had just ended was too intense and thrilling to allow me to fall asleep easily. I kept thinking of Edward in the meadow, how his skin sparkled like a moving stone statue. My mind skipped from image to image… the wildflowers in the meadow, Edward's cool hands on my skin, his sudden reaction to my breathing him in unexpectedly.

Is it possible that this perfect being was able to _touch_ me after revealing his secret? After telling me that his desire to drink my blood was overwhelming every time he was near me? It was hard to believe, but I didn't want him to go away. Not for a second.

It was half past one in the morning when I finally drifted off.

A short while later, I felt a hand on my calf. I was lying on my side and woke up to see Edward perched at the edge of my bed. He was looking down at his own hand that was holding my calf.

I felt my heart beat increase, but I didn't move. I just lied there timidly, my arm underneath my pillow, watching him.

Edward must have heard my heart, too. A crooked smile spread across his lips, but he didn't look up from his hand on my leg. He knew I was awake.

"How did you get in here?" I whispered. I sat up onto my hip. His hand slid down towards my ankle inadvertently as I sat up. He cupped his fingers around my foot. I was suddenly reminded again that Edward Cullen was touching me, even if it was through my quilt.

He was wearing dark jeans and a light blue button-up shirt. His cuffs were unbuttoned, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. I took notice of his smooth, muscled forearms.

My thoughts suddenly went to Charlie, wondering if he heard Edward climb up the side of the house.

Edward looked up at me. "I came in through the window." His crooked smile widened. It was too dim in my room to see what color his eyes were. "Don't worry about Charlie. He's fast asleep. Can't you hear him snoring?" he asked, as if this were an obvious fact.

I couldn't hear Charlie's snores. My door was shut firmly and Charlie's room was down the hallway. I had almost forgotten how hypersensitive Edward's ears were. I was going to have to get used to these special talents of his.

"I don't hear anything," I said, tucking my hair behind my ear.

Edward stopped smiling and seemed to look curiously at my face, studying it. In fact, I could have sworn he was looking at my ear that I just touched.

"What is it?" I asked.

"Just…observing," he said quietly. He stared into my eyes intently and I felt my face blush with embarrassment.

Edward looked back down at his right hand. He moved his palm back up to my calf, caressing it with his thumb. He was looking at his hand as if he didn't quite know what it might do. Like he was testing himself.

"I have to confess something to you," Edward said.

"Oh boy," I chuckled. What else could he have to confess to me? Wasn't the cat out of the bag now? You know, being a vampire and all.

He looked back into my eyes, a mischievous grin on his face. "I've been coming to your room for quite some time now. Always at night. I feel a bit silly about it, but…I couldn't help it. My curiosity about you was almost unbearable."

Wow. He's been watching me sleep? Now I felt a mixture of embarrassment and flattery.

He looked back up at me, his brow furrowed in worry. "Are you upset?"

"No—No, I just…" I smiled and looked down. "I'm going to have to stop wearing holey t-shirts and sweatpants to bed if I know you'll be watching me."

His expression changed to relief. "I like your holey shirts." He smiled and then stood up. He walked to my dresser in the corner of my room, next to the window. He opened the second drawer from the top—my heart skipped a beat, fearing he might open my underwear drawer by accident—and pulled out one of my t-shirts. It was a faded pink shirt that I wore only to bed. It was way too tattered to be shown off in public. Edward held it in his hands, feeling the fabric. Then he raised it slowly to his face, closed his eyes, and drew in a deep breath.

I didn't quite know what to say or feel at this moment. I just stared.

He let out his breath, and it looked like he was smiling. "Your room was very difficult for me to even set foot in when I came up here the first time," he said, placing my shirt back in its drawer, then turning to look at me. "Your scent in here is concentrated. It's on _everything_, in every crack in the floorboards, on your furniture... I stood in the far corner there" –he pointed to the opposite corner, the furthest spot from my bed—"because I was too afraid to get any nearer. But, every night I came I would force myself to stand closer to you."

"I wonder why I never woke up when you were here," I said, almost to myself. I crossed my legs under the covers.

"Oh, I can be quite silent when I want to be. I made sure I never woke you."

Edward came back over to me and sat at the edge of the bed again.

"How long have you been…visiting me? At night, I mean," I asked hesitantly.

"Oh, for about a month, I suppose. I like watching you sleep. It's sort of fascinating to me."

I didn't know what to say. Again, embarrassment and flattery washed over me, turning my cheeks red.

Edward must have noticed my blush. He raised his fingers and brushed them down across my cheek. I wasn't expecting his sudden move. The electric, cool rush his touch left behind made my heart stutter.

"I love it when your cheeks flush like that," he whispered, the crooked smile returning to his lips.

He brushed my other cheek with his fingers and I felt my breathing stop.

"Breathe, Bella," he said, putting his hand down.

"Sorry. It's just—you have no idea how that feels." I looked down, feeling shy about what I said.

Edward scooted closer to me. He put his finger under my chin, lifting my head up to look at him. He was now only inches away from my face. He was studying my expression—perhaps trying to figure out what I was thinking—and his eyes moved down, looking at my cheeks, my neck, my hair.

"Bella, if we are going to be with each other, there are steps I need to take," he said.

"What do you mean?"

"These feelings I have when I am with you—they are both exhilarating and torturous at the same time. I want to be near you, but I have two different desires that battle within me _constantly_. I have never felt this way before." He continued staring at my skin as he spoke, examining it.

"Neither have I," I said, looking at his lips as he spoke.

"I have to practice." He looked away, his brow furrowed in what looked to me like contemplation.

"Practice? Practice what?"

"Being near you."

He took one of my hands into his. His skin was so cold, but mine somehow was warming at his touch.

"Like how we are now?" I asked, looking down at my hand in his.

"Yes. But, I need to get used to your scent as well. It's extremely overwhelming when I haven't been around you for a period of time. If I'm away from you for too long—even for a day—it's like that first day in Biology all over again. I can't take the risk of ever hurting you, Bella."

I shivered slightly at the memory of his gruesome expression when he looked at me that day in Biology. "What do you intend to do in order to 'practice' being with me?" I asked.

"Well, among other things, I need to..._breathe_ you. Deeply."

He took my hand and raised it to his face. I cupped his hard jaw with my hand as he closed his eyes and inhaled at my palm. His breath was unbelievably cool as he let his air out onto my wrist. "And I need to not expect what's coming. I have to be able to handle anything. What happened in the meadow today, the way I ran from you—I don't want that to happen again. You caught me off guard."

He looked at me, holding my palm to his face, and then, slowly, let go of it. I suddenly realized that he had given me full control of my own hand, and I let it stay there on his cheek.

Then, he said, "I want you to test me."

_**A/N: What did you think so far? Do you want to read the next chapter? If I get enough comments/reviews, I will post the next chapter right away. I'd love some constructive criticism! Thanks! **_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Author's Note: Wow, thanks to those who have added me and reviewed my work so far! Here is the second chapter. What I did with this entire story is took some of my favorite aspects of Twilight and went from there. Purely for my own amusement. The story in its entirety is more like one long scene, but I thought it might be too lengthy for a "one shot." Any feedback is appreciated!**_

**Restraint, Ch. 2**

I could still feel Edward's cool breath on my wrist as I held my palm to his sculpted face.

"You want me to test you? Edward, I—" I started, but he put a finger to my lips. The place where his finger touched me burned with a cool tingle.

"Don't worry, Bella. I have grown more used to you, and it's becoming easier to…take it all in," he said.

He grabbed my hand that was at his cheek and lowered it into his lap. His manner with me was so gentle, so slow. He didn't want to hurt me.

"Wait a moment," he said. He scrutinized my face a bit longer.

"What?" I said.

"What are you thinking?" he asked.

"Um…" I licked my lips, wondering how to word my thoughts.

"Come on now, don't do that to me." He smiled. "What are you thinking?"

"I just…I have had this strongest urge to—to _touch_ you. Your skin, it's like—electric. And now you are practically putting yourself in my hands, and I have no idea what to do."

I felt these words rush out of me, like they made no sense. I suddenly had the feeling that he might change his mind, and my heart ached at the thought.

"Funny you say that," he replied, cocking his head to the side, still looking at me intently. He leaned in closer to me, his eyes drifting to my cheeks again, to my neck. "I've had that same urge," he stated. "And your skin feels very much the same to me."

"Really?"

"Oh, yes. It's an incredible sensation. Almost hot and cold at the same time."

Edward moved closer to me, then leaned down and slipped off his shoes. He swung his right leg across me and placed his foot on my other side, leaving his left foot planted on the floor below. I was now sitting cross-legged in between his legs.

Surprisingly, I was relieved that we shared the same feelings about the whole touching thing. The urge to touch, the electricity that physically flowed when we _did_ touch. This brought some comfort to me and I felt my butterflies settle down a little.

"Wait…" he said.

"What are you doing?" I asked, taking notice of his new position in front of me.

"Just…observing," he said again. He winked at me. "Now, Bella, be very still. Please."

I couldn't disobey when he spoke that way. I sat perfectly still, hearing nothing but my pounding heart and rapid breathing. I focused all my attention onto my body's stillness.

Edward gazed at my face again, as he had tonight already. He raised his hand and held my chin and gently tilted my head to the left. He leaned in and brushed his nose across my exposed cheek. I could feel him draw in a breath and exhale slowly.

My heart was going to pound right out of my chest.

"Breathe, Bella."

"I'm trying," I whispered, shivering from his cold breath. "It's hard to breathe normally when you're—doing that."

He chuckled and I felt the quick, small bursts of air on my jaw.

I closed my eyes. He moved his hand that was under my chin and placed it around the back of my head, holding it tenderly, intertwining his cold fingers into my hair. His nose moved slowly to my ear, then just underneath it, breathing deeply the entire time. His face moved down the side of my neck.

Edward was so close to my skin that I had to hold my breath. I knew he could probably see, hear, _and_ smell the blood that was pulsing fast through my arteries.

"Isn't this—uh—torturing you?" I stuttered.

"A little, but it's getting better. The burning in my throat has almost subsided completely. Mmm," he groaned. Again, I felt his cool breath on my neck as he spoke and it sent shivers down my spine. I could smell his sweet breath, too. "You have no idea how lovely you smell."

I opened my eyes, blinked, and swallowed. "You know, you have a scent, too." I said.

He stopped for a moment, perhaps thinking about what I just said. Then he took his other hand, the one not holding the back of my head, and grabbed a section of my hair. Then, he inhaled a deep breath of it. I promptly thanked myself for showering before bed.

"Do I?" he said, talking into my hair. It sounded like he was smiling. "Tell me about that."

"Well…" I gulped again.

He dropped my hair and inhaled slowly at my neck again. It was extremely difficult to think and speak while Edward was intoxicating himself.

"You smell sweet," I said. "Almost like a rose, but it's subtle. You don't smell like a human at all."

Another small burst of air as he chuckled. I had goose bumps now.

"Like I said before, that is how we attract our human prey," he stated.

I shuddered slightly.

Edward came back to my face, examining it once more. For one shocked second, I thought he was going to kiss me. But, he grabbed my head with both hands, his fingers in my hair, and tilted my head up. I was almost looking at the ceiling. In fact, I had to lean backwards, resting my upper back against the headboard.

I closed my eyes. He leaned forward, too, hovering over me as I moved. He changed the position of his leg that was on the bed to make himself more comfortable.

Edward acted as if nothing changed in our proximity. Did he feel like he was pushing his limit? I trusted him, but I didn't want him to all of a sudden be overwhelmed with guilt or fear and stop.

God knows I didn't want him to stop.

I felt his breath draw a slow line from underneath my chin, across my neck, moving its way to the other side. He took in another deep breath just below my other ear.

I closed my eyes again and shuddered at his closeness. "Do you have any idea what you are doing to me right now?" I couldn't help myself from asking.

"I can imagine," he replied. He slowly turned my head to the side, away from his face, so he could breathe in and out across the side of my neck.

Then, he placed his cold lips on my neck and gave it a soft kiss.

His kiss gave me a chill. My heart sputtered and I couldn't help but let suck in a quick breath of air—a small gasp.

Edward turned my head towards him again, and he stared at me with concerned eyes. He placed his hands at my lower back and pulled me back up to a sitting position again.

"Are you alright? Did I do something wrong?" he asked.

Kissing my neck was in no way wrong. "No, no. I was…pleasantly surprised, that's all." I smiled at him.

"Keeping you safe is the most important thing to me, Bella. If I am the most dangerous thing to you, then I must train myself to control my urges. I have to practice restraint."

"_All_ your urges?" I asked, smirking.

He smiled back. "No. Not all my urges. Just the dangerous ones." He bent his knee again, resting his foot flat on my bed, next to my hip. I was once again in between his legs.

"How do you feel?" I asked.

"Quite content, actually." He brushed some hair away from my face with one slow, swift movement of his fingers. He was so graceful, even with the smallest of movements.

"Oh." I couldn't think of much else to say.

"Bella?"

"Yes?"

"It's your turn now."

I blinked. "My turn to what?"

He narrowed his eyes at me, smiling that beautiful crooked smile of his.

"I want you to test me." He straightened up and placed his hands firmly behind his back. "Do whatever you wish, Bella. I trust you."

Edward winked at me again and closed his eyes.

_**A/N: Would you like Chapter 3? I'd love to hear what you think! Thank you so much!**_


	3. Chapter 3

_**A/N: Again, thanks to all of you who have read my story so far! This is the last chapter and I hope you enjoy. Please leave comments and feedback. :-)**_

**Restraint, Ch. 3**

**Bella's POV**

I looked at Edward's face. His eyes were closed, his hands behind his back. A small hint of his crooked smile remained.

"You're serious?" I asked.

"Yes, Bella." He didn't open his eyes.

I felt a sudden thrill of knowing that I could have the freedom to do what I had wanted to do for such a long time. He had put total trust in me. How could I let him down?

"Okay, then. Get ready," I said, grinning.

Edward chuckled softly.

I admired his face for a moment longer. Slowly, I leaned forward and reached around him, grabbing one of his hands that he hid from me. He jumped just a bit, perhaps startled, then relaxed. The top of my head brushed his chin as I reached behind him, and I knew he could probably smell my hair. All of a sudden, I didn't care. I _wanted_ him to smell it.

He let his arm and hand loose and allowed me to bring his arm in front of him—in front of _me_. I brought his palm up to my own face, just as he had done with mine, and took in a deep breath of his cool palm.

His scent _was_ much like a rose. I blew a breath purposefully onto his wrist.

I looked up at his face. He did not open his eyes, but he was smirking.

I placed his hand on the top of my thigh, stretching his arm out. I took both of my hands and felt the cold, marble skin of his forearm. I had imagined on more than a few occasions what his skin must feel like. I had wanted badly during Biology class to reach over and do just what I was doing now—caressing his arm, feeling the muscle underneath. His skin was so incredibly soft, smooth, hard, and beautiful.

I looked up again at Edward's face. His expression had changed. His brow was furrowed slightly, and his crooked smile was gone. I felt the muscles in his arm tense.

"Edward?" I said. I stopped.

He opened his eyes and looked concentrated on mine. "Please, don't stop. It was just—overwhelming for a moment. I'm fine now."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. Please."

I placed his hand that was on my thigh onto my waist. I reached around and grabbed his other hand, having them both now in front of him. I placed my hands on each of his arms. I slowly leaned forward towards Edward's neck, just as he had with me. I breathed him in deeply, with a content smile on my face. This time, he didn't flinch and he did not run away as he did in the meadow yesterday. His smell was sweet and comforting.

Edward let out a long sigh.

I leaned back to look at his face again. I was a little startled to see his eyes were open, looking at me in a very determined way. I stared back.

I didn't really think much about what I did next. It just popped into my head and before I knew it, my fingers were at Edward's shirt.

"Bella—"

"Shh. Don't worry," I said.

I unbuttoned only two buttons, and then slowly pressed my palm against his cold chest. This would have been where I could have felt his heart, if it were still beating.

Edward wasn't breathing. He placed his hand over mine.

My heart leapt when I heard loud footsteps in the hallway. I jerked my head towards my bedroom door, listening. Charlie was awake.

Edward turned my face back towards him. My hand was still on his chest, as was his. He looked at me and smiled. He turned his gaze toward the door. He was a much better listener than I was.

I sat in nervous silence. Charlie had gotten up to use the bathroom, and when Edward assured me that Charlie was back to snoring once more, I felt much relief.

"This has been quite an interesting night. You should get some sleep," Edward said, pulling my hand away from his cold chest.

"Please, don't go," I said. I glanced at the clock. It was ten after three.

"We've got class tomorrow, remember?" he said, touching my lips.

"How can I focus on anything?" I stared at his mouth.

"I'm sure you'll manage," he chuckled. He got up off my bed and straightened the covers that were still over me. I grudgingly slid back down onto my pillow. I felt heavy sleepiness wave over me almost instantly.

"Goodnight, Bella. I'll be right here if you need me."

Edward moved towards the opposite end of the room and looked out the window. He seemed to be deep in thought.

I stared at the back of him for a moment, examining his statuesque body posture.

I got out of bed and marched towards him.

He turned around swiftly to face me, obviously not expecting me to get out of bed.

"Bella?" he said.

I didn't say anything. I just grabbed his face and lowered it to mine. I planted my lips onto his cool mouth, holding nothing back.

Edward seemed taken aback, not quite responding to my kiss.

Did I just make a huge mistake, taking this risk? Did I come on too strong and put myself in danger?

Without warning, Edward wrapped his arms around my waist and hoisted me up with little effort. He kissed me much more passionately than he did yesterday after we left the meadow.

Now _I_ was the one who was stunned.

He picked me up and walked towards the bed, never removing his mouth from mine. He set me down next to him and held my face in his strong, cool hands. After he kissed me for a few moments longer, he stopped. Both of us were breathing heavily. We rested our foreheads against each others'.

"Wow," he said. "That was…unexpected." He laughed quietly, musically. He brushed my hair back with his fingers.

I smiled and sighed. "I'm pretty sure I'll be able to have pleasant dreams now that I have _that_ to think about."

Edward tucked me in bed and lay beside me, stroking my hair as I drifted off into an easy sleep.

_**A/N: Thanks for reading! I suppose Edward was **_**slightly**_** out of character here, since I don't think he would have actually acted this way in Twilight. (Maybe he would have in Eclipse or Breaking Dawn…) Please leave a review. :-)**_


End file.
